Glass Avenue

James Blunt - I'll take everything (Koko, London, Sept 2007)

2011-01-06T10:33:00.000-08:00

An unfished ending...

2010-10-24T11:16:00.000-07:00

Every so often the idea that routine is necessity rears it's distinguished and misguided head.
For men like me it raises the question of causality in relation to a routing of habitual commonplace. I believe many adventures are missed for the sake of stereotyped lives.

Everywhere in our society tales are told of men becoming legend by doing what is necessary rather than what is typical.
The only time you hear tales of the ordinary are at the end of a persons life. In a small circle typically consisting of family. It's a scene easy to picture... A man speaks at the funeral of a friend noting his consistency, his hard work, his attention to detail. Perhaps touching on his family life, but no one ever says this friend of ours challenged us, they inspired us to do things differently, to look through new eyes... they changed the lives of everyone whether the individual being changed knew it our not.

Forgive me but the next versing will be in semi-narcissistic prose.
I feel among those encounter few are exceptional, few are special. I don't say that to bring low the worth of others, or to make myself feel important. I say it because rarely do I encounter individuals with revolutionary lives, with ideas that push the fringes of the known.
I present a challenge, to design a new set of ideas rather than just refine the ideas of our fathers. You are capable of the same greatness that is written in history books... why waste it by doing things the same?

Same ol' song sung to the choir

2010-09-11T16:36:00.000-07:00

Over the past few years I have grown increasingly displeased with the state of justice in america.
And before I jump too deeply into details I want to focus on one simple piece of common knowledge.
It takes one fanatic to ruin the whole show.
How often do we see signs of terrorism? Or hear stories of corrupted politicians?
Now ask yourself are all men with religious merit terrorists? Is every person that has written law corrupted by corporate interest?
The answer is no, but more often than not you'll hear about those who have wronged others in catastrophic prose. Far More so than the majority,the regular, the rest of us.
I feel there is but one answer... And that is to destroy evil wherever it may make its home.
Let not our hearts be torn with hatred but keep our eyes focused on truth and justice!

Punishment

2010-05-17T15:41:00.001-07:00

"Sometimes the law is helpless to act, even when it identifies the guilty. It follows, therefore, that sometimes it is necessary to act ouside the law, to shame its inadequacy, to pursue a natural justice. I'm not talking about vengeance. Revenge is not a valid motive. It's a tawdry, emotional response no better than the act that provokes it. I'm talking about...PUNISHMENT."-Frank Castle aka The Punisher.

Life... and once it reaches it's end

2009-11-29T10:33:00.000-08:00

I'm realizing that I have an issue of trying to sum up the totality of life based on current merit.
If the times are good then life is good but if the times are bad then life is not worth living.

The intrinsic problem with this view is that life is made whole only through the parts... while in the same breath it would be impossible to judge the quality of life with out first having an established standard.
So what is a good life? Is this question doomed to be eternally fluid. A sliding scale that never gains footing. Or are there universal guidelines?

Simply put there is no one simple answers.

Life is not all we experience, it's the way we encounter, the way we react.
And the best part is, it does not begin and end with us, nor is it summed up by others.

2009-11-25T09:44:00.000-08:00

It's been so long since I've been afforded the opportunity to relax.
I am currently in the last half of my vacation and have some time to think... It has occurred to me that for almost the past 3 years I have worked a job I hate. Dated women I don't care for. And spent most of my waking moments trying to live up to this idea unseen.
I have not accomplished much in terms of my life goals... sure I did all the things on my list of new years resolutions but as for permanent decisions the past few years have been a gracious art of floundering.

The truth doesn't sell, so lets only package lies.

2009-09-22T10:04:00.001-07:00

"If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it..." - Hitler
We've all heard reports about tea parties and anti- campaigns and health care reform, and bailouts....
The question comes to who is telling the truth anymore?

Freedom

2009-08-15T17:41:00.001-07:00

Freedom cannot be forced into existence, nor can it be won through painful struggle. Freedom cannot be bought or sold. It has nothing to do with one’s social status; one’s profession is of no consequence. In order for you to accept yourself as you are and live with your soul at peace, you must simply teach yourself to let it be, only then will you discover freedom.-Zuikō Samurai Champloo

Doppelgänger, and all the glorious dead....

2009-08-05T06:08:00.000-07:00

"I honestly want to turn this world to mere ash and kill everyone in it..."

I've never really admitted to anyone but I think a lot about death.
Not just in a suicidal sense or one with murderous intentions, but a death in terms of legacy.

Many men speak of new beginnings but I find it necessary to first speak of an end.
The end of corruption, the end of willing weakness, the end of complacency.

We are often fed our thoughts and emotions our likes and dislikes and what we do not collect we inherit partially through osmosis. Now this isn't the results of a scientific study, nor simple conjecture. But the result of simple observation.
A son typically seeks to imitate his father... children dress up in their parents clothes and often (comically) impersonate our "best" traits.

Even though through adolescence we go through the process of self discovery, our ideas are often formed from outside influence.

The ending I seek is not one of destruction one thats sole purpose is a tearing down.
But I seek an apocalypse. An ending that is whole, that is complete that doesn't leave in it's wake pain but one that leaves purity.
And this end has to be birthed first in thought. Society must shift it's line of conscience from imitation to one of creation.

What will be written about us is what happens in our day to day.
even our lives are a mere short story compared to the scope of history.

Be aware of an end.

one part of the truth....

2009-07-28T16:27:00.001-07:00

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it. - Mary Wilson

The problem with the religious right and the liberal left....

2009-07-11T14:05:00.000-07:00

This is a challenge for most americans but for this post I will focus on one... myself.
The challenge is simple; it is also a word that is misused so often it has become bastard.
It is summed up in the word "Love."
As one who prescribes to the biblical idea of “Christianity,” I realize love is held in the highest of standards. I don’t mean a love romantic in nature but a love that is unconditional yet somehow not unattached.

Jesus statements in Matt 22:36 are one of the best examples of unconditional love.

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" ³⁷Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' ³⁸This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' ⁴⁰All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

Now I’m not usually one to quote scriptures because not all people believe it, so I will make an attempt at narrative.
As a wise friend put it to me “unconditional love is the kind of love a mother has for a child… even in the face of adversity. Like when she knows her child is going to cause great harm to the (her) world and she births him anyway… that is love inexplicable.”

That is the kind of love that I do not possess… like many I find it easier to find fault than to extend grace. I do not have a genuine love for the scourge the derelicts the lost if you will. But in the same breath I do not have a love for the betters, the wealthy, or the upper class.

With the constant push in the media for more and an under surge of selfishness; the constant need to consume and think of “your” betterment. There is no time for others or the thought of need outside our own. And I have bought into this lie, this illusion hook line and sinker. But I have pushed it to its fringes so much so that I completely exclude the thought of others… right down to their humanity.

But the best thing about love is it’s a choice. No matter how often that choice needs to be renewed, in it’s most basic form it is a decision. And unconditional love is the choice to extend grace to everyone.

Revolution is an idea and never an action

2009-07-07T10:02:00.001-07:00

Upon contemplating freedom I wonder if it's possible that we are resting on the laurels and ideas of anarchists and revolutionaries.

MKULTRA

2009-07-07T09:58:00.001-07:00

Another of the great systems of control is none other than the Government.

They regulate every aspect of life from what you eat to how you have sex. Every product you buy is sealed with a stamp of approval by good ol' Uncle Sam. And those without that stamp cannot be sold. Every movie you watch is rated based on uncle sams standards telling you content with phrases like mature subject mater.

Granted so far none of these are bad things, many of them are meant to protect you. But how many times have you had a say in product quality standards or movie rating systems? Now you may be thinking I have a say in the way I spend and in what I watch. While this may be true how often have you had say in a products minimum operation time or just what PG13 really means, when was the last time you understood the list of ingredients on something as simple a bubble gum.
The point I'm trying to make is this; in allowing constant regulation of our lives we loose control. We relinquish it to a select few, a group of senators, a board or committee, a CEO.
And I've said it before, corruption comes in many colors.... no one is immune. Why is it the minority rule over the majority?
Today I resign to begin a quite uprising... one of those things to make you think.

The Latest and the Greatest

2009-07-05T09:41:00.000-07:00

The strange thing about honesty is it's unwavering. It doesn't care about your feelings or insight, it is only and can only be one thing.
To be honest I still haven't let my dream die.

2009-07-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

"...what Malcolm X said when he got silenced by Elijah Mohammed was in fact true, America's chickens…are coming home to roost. We took this country by terror, away from the Sioux, the Apache, the Arowak, the Comanche, the Arapahoe, the Navajo. Terrorism. We took Africans from their country to build our way of ease and kept them enslaved and living in fear. Terrorism. We bombed Granada and killed innocent civilians, babies, non-military personnel. We bombed the black civilian community of Panama with stealth bombers and killed unarmed teenagers and toddlers, pregnant mothers, and hardworking fathers. We bombed Qaddafi's home and killed his child. Blessed are they who bash your children's head against a rock. We bombed Iraq. We killed unarmed civilians trying to make a living. We bombed a plant in Sudan to payback for the attack on our embassy, killed hundreds of hardworking people, mothers and fathers who left home to go that day not knowing that they would never get back home. We bombed Hiroshima, we bombed Nagasaki, and we nuked far more than the thousands in New York and the Pentagon and we never batted an eye. Kids playing in the playground, mothers picking up children from school, civilians, not soldiers, people just trying to make it day by day.

We have supported state terrorism against the Palestinians and Black South Africans and now we are indignant because the stuff we have done overseas is now brought right back to our own front yards. America's chickens are coming home to roost."

2009-07-01T13:15:00.000-07:00

I'm making attempts at a lot of things. Lately the greatest of these fashions is honesty... me trying to be honest with myself, honest with others, honest with God. You see the truth is the more someone believes something the more likely he is to act on it. So what do i do? I do nothing for the simple reason I believe nothing or no one. I'm not quite sure which.
Or perhaps the things I believe are my own... not yet written in the marks of men.

It seems these burdens I carry... I carry them alone.
And this faith I have, this mantra I live by... I'd die for. Well I believe it truth but I cannot see it... It cannot be quantified.

So where does this leave me? Alone questioning my very existence, or deny the one thing I've know all along....

....Money, its a crime. Share it fairly but dont take a slice of my pie. Money, so they say Is the root of all evil today.

2009-06-20T04:57:00.000-07:00

The largest controller in the world at this time is money.
We slave away for it, go to great lengths to get it store it in mattresses and special building with walls more secure than the buildings where our young are born.
Money can either liberate or enslave as it has for thousands of years. Those of us that don't have it work for those that do.
I posted an excerpt from the lyrics to Pink Floyd's song "Money" as my title to help me gain slight perspective.
See the problem with money is that it's ever fleeting, it's always grounded in uncertainty.
And it's always controlled by those unseen.
Or is it?
The truth is we are one of the wealthiest generations ever. Compared to the rest of the world we can buy what we want and need (not necessarily in that order).
And the truth is very few of us are not captive to greed.

I pose the question what is work worth and whats is really the value of money?
I mean it's paper or metal and sometimes it's not even that... for instance. The stock market is a trade in shares and stocks. Digital numerals that aren't guaranteed to have any physical backing whatsoever.
Not trying to knock our system of trade, but simply trying give a realistic view of the thing we spend most of our day obeying.

Where do you place your wealth?

Tick tock goes the clock....

2009-06-08T16:34:00.000-07:00

This is the second in what is seemingly a never ending sea of discontent.
"Time" is the beast I speak of, it swallows us whole without our consent. How many different instances has "time" come up in your daily life? 9-5, 24/7 365, time has become more than just a unit of measurement it has become the invisible dominator of society.
We measure our lives, and grade some aspect of ourselves with it, making false assumptions that the longer we have the more we can get done. This subversive line is again based on quantity rather than quality.
Moving about with wary eyes firmly fixed on an invisible constraint can cause a loss of focus.
Imagine for a moment if you were able to focus on each activity you engaged in with the utmost singularity. With out deadlines, and the constant pull of the next thing. The quality of all you do would increase significantly... being able to play everything out to it's completion.

And I'm not speaking of living in the moment with reckless abandon. I'm Speaking of shearing the chains and constraints of schedule.
Don't look at the clock... cause it'll just come back around to say the same thing again.

The first in control....

2009-05-13T08:48:00.001-07:00

.... this is the first of several post about various controllers in this american existence.
First off i wanted to say these are fact's not truth.
The difference facts can be changed truth cannot.
These post are also my opinion not news.

The first in controllers is the class and location in which you are born and live in.
Someone who is born in an affluent neighborhood has more opportunities available to them.
While in contrast those born in poorer circumstance will have to work much harder to get half those opportunities.
Allow me a moment for an analogy: Two children born on the same day in the same city on different sides of town, their parents have the same dreams for them... the same goals. Both families are comprised of 4 children, 2 working parents, and they have similar expenses a mortgage, 2 cars and all the insurance and taxes for everyday living.
The only two differences in these families are their locations and incomes.
We all know the lure of the "American dream" we all feel it's pull because it has been conditioned into us.
While the Child Born uptown has greater means beyond that of the government regulated services and education the child born downtown is limited by the fact that his parents means can not provide him those opportunities.
It is a simple analogy but one often overlooked by the idea that we are all created equal.
This idea never taking into thought the simple fact of privilege.

Controllers...

2009-05-07T05:27:00.001-07:00

Soon I'll be doing a series of posts about the various things that control our lives. Sometimes voluntarily other times with out our knowledge.

it'a been awhile... but we are not yet machines.

2009-05-04T09:06:00.001-07:00

Strange things have continually happened during my time between post. I wont go into much detail but i will say this humanity has been reduced to such an extent that sometimes i feel the powers that be have forgot that at the end of their research and the end of formulas lies a human being.... a person with a soul.
A heart, and mind that cannot be disconnected from this mortal coil... the tether that binds us together but remains intangible is our longing for love.
And I don't mean love in a romantic sense but unconditional community.
Don't mistake my remarks for the ever so popular new wave of communism that sweeps this nation. But humanity needs to be reminded of the needs of others the cares of other and the longings of all around us.

Quote of the day

2009-04-02T05:16:00.001-07:00

"Try to exclude the possibility of suffering which the order of nature and the existence of free-wills involve, and you find that you have excluded life itself."
C. S. Lewis

Good quote....

2009-04-01T08:16:00.001-07:00

"It has been said that our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength."
Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Again And Again...on and on into oblivion

2009-03-29T06:08:00.000-07:00

You ever get that feeling that life is passing you by? Or perhaps it's the opposite, you're to busy to come up for air. What happened to balance and composure?
When I was younger (not saying I'm old) I used to think being "grown up" was about how busy I could be, how many different tasks I could juggle.
And the truth is, like peter pans lost boys, or Toys'r'us I never wanted to grow up.

"Life is not solely about tasks, but tastes"

Life is one of those things we seem to talk about, and attempt to live. But many of us never seem to experience.
Granted many of us are in the clutches of a "career" or some other consuming effort,
take the time out to look at the sky, notice a new song, be kind for no reason, then share it with someone. Look for the intricate details....

compassion in the midst of crisis.....

2009-03-23T09:46:00.000-07:00

In recent months we have heard time and time again about the growing financial crisis in america.
From the breakdown of the mortgage industry, to the collapse of wall street, it seems no financial market is safe. And what resolution did our leaders give us in our time of uncertainty? They gave our money away to companies who on a grand scale make products far inferior to their competitors (you have no choice in the matter they will take it via taxes).
And if that wasn't bad enough you have the Maddoffs and AIGs to rip you off in a completely new sense of the word.

So what is one to do in times of blatant greed, and when law has clearly been reduce to a set of managerial mantras.
Are we to turn inward and hoard what little we can hide from prying eyes... if this is the answer i fear we as americans may be headed for the end... greed, selfishness, and autonomy where the traits that original pushed this raft out on the sea of confusion.

I believe we need to whole heartedly let go... and that simply means instead of holding the wealth of this great nation with a clinched fist, offer it with open palms... not to major corporations or those who would simply pocket a profit but to those in genuine need. Those who would help others, and build products that have a lasting value, those that can revolutionize business by making it honest once more (no one remembers the day when a mans word was all the contract needed and the handshake would seal the deal), those who will train the youth to continue the process of growth....

In plain terms the financial rescue was failed from the start... for the simple reason it left that sense of autonomy in tact. It provided a get out of jail free card if you will.... for the very kind of irresponsibility that sank these institutions and began this vicious cycle.

The day after the end of the world

2008-10-12T12:16:00.000-07:00

After having a rough couple week it was defiantly time to relax and live a little...
and on that saturday night in my drunken shell. I had one of the most honest conversations of my life. And from that moment sparked a line of thought that would have otherwise gone unnoticed.
Feeling sick of monotony....
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/dead
Definition 11 and 12 of dead i find particularly interesting... because as of late i have felt that lack of enthusiasm for chasing the 9-5 and climbing the corporate ladder.
The typical American lifeline seems to flow as follows.
Birth
Primary Education
Secondary Education
Work
Reproduction
Death
Now granted there are a few more intricate steps than that, lets breakdown these few.

You are born into this world perfect unscathed... your parents have the grandest of dreams, fears and hope for your future.

Primary education, is one of the most interesting fazes of life for many it is there fist exposure to other humans, other people like ourselves. At this faze we learn about things like peer pressure, acceptability, manners, and in general how the people around us can effect our lives as we affect theirs. I think one of the greatest examples would be the first kiss or the first love... how we connect with these people through words and interactions how our facial expression can sometimes say more than our phrases.

Secondary Education is the greatest hoax to hit planet earth... From my observation of my college grad friends, and from the two years i spent in school.
I have noticed College cost thousands of dollars, forces you live in the poorest conditions, doesn't guarantee you a job of any kind, and is a day late and a dollar short on specialized training. If instead of taking four years to sit through math, spanish, and a ton of other classes that have nothing to do with my major cut to the chase and tech me what i came here to learn.
As a psychology major why should i have to sit through trigonometry? Of what use is trig?
And at the end of it all after the money is spent, and through the sleepless nights i'm not guaranteed to get a job to support myself or at least one the field i was interested in when i began this journey. All in all you're betting your future on the whims of other men.

After the years of partying and other wasted efforts begins the real work. And life moves from a waste of time to a serious of injustice.
The corporate beast has been birthed. Now comes the phase of life where in general and on mass scale your dreams of youth are met with their end... the 9-5. As now most of your time will be consumed with making money for the grand scheme of survival.

But many fail to realize the difference between making a living and making a life...

in short, of what benefit is it to to spend unyielding hours in an office, or on a construction site or behind a desk... what benefit is to be had?
Some will say money but the truth is the company pays you what they think you should have as opposed to how much you're really worth. For instance on my job I've sold numerous shows totaling hundreds of thousands yet I only make several thousand per year.

Being a "productive citizen." I don't know about you but the last time my job did anything good for planet earth or the human collective... wait, it never has. The entire focus of many companies is to get money. and many do this by defying the age old adage "you don't get something for nothing."

Also the lessons learned in youth are put into practice here. the peer pressure from childhood, the mismanagement of time, the shifted focus. They're all here in this phase... on this leg of the journey. But the death of sorts is the birth of the next phase the reproduction and reconstruction phase. Not all but many people choose to reproduce and only the wise try to make life for their offspring better than the one they were placed into.
But this too can be a dangerous battle ground... bleeding into the excess. and generating a life of self.

Having a child can shift your focus from a "what about me" to "they are my everything." And for such a dramatic shift the danger of forgetting those around us is ever present. You see the problem is not with motivation but with mindset... western civilization has such a vast capacity for personal autonomy.
I'm not saying adopt a herd mentality, I'm saying we need to strive to build community. Need to connect with those of like mind to protect the good of all (not just the few, or the many, but all).
I believe this an attainable goal one which will take more work, time and patience than we as a western civilization are accustom to... but that is a conversation for another time.